1. You hate it. Your alarm goes off in the morning, you’re filled with dread at the prospect of dragging yourself into the office for another day of hell.
2. You love it. Weirdo. You’re lying, see point 1.
3. It’s OK. Average mediocrity leads to an early death.
4. The cold sweats. You get them. I know you do. You don’t have to say it out loud yet, just nod your head and I’ll understand.
5. You’re living for the weekend. Two days to yourself just isn’t enough. You tried to convince yourself that Thursday was the new Friday. Then Wednesday became the new Thursday. In truth you go wild on Friday night, recover on Saturday and are frozen into inertia on Sunday. Sir/Madam, you’re down to a one day weekend.
6. Sunday night terrors. Cold sweats on acid. I’ll say no more.
7. A case of the Mondays. Shit it’s happened, it’s here, you’re alarm clock says get up, you pull the covers tighter around you and hit snooze. Repeatedly.
8. The man is taking advantage of you. You go in early, work through lunch, leave late, get home, eat, sleep, wake, repeat.
9. You have responsibilities. To yourself to be happy. Go on, do it. I double dare you.
10. You can do anything you want. You can. I know you can. Well maybe not that. Or that. But you had that idea once didn’t you? That one that’s still there in the back of your mind, niggling away, soon to become a regret.
11. You’ve just read the first 10 points…